Googling Myself

Bored and in need of cheap entertainment, I decided to Google myself. For the uninitiated, this is not something dirty. Googling yourself just means looking up your name on the Internet to see what you can find out about yourself or other people who share your name.


Here's what I found out...


1)  I am not an NFL wide receiver for the Denver Broncos (and thereby future target for future Hall of Famer, Peyton Manning). This guy is...

Jason Hill, wide receiver

I know this to be true, because me and this guy look nothing alike. Also, I was not born in San Francisco, California; I was born in Greenville, North Carolina. And I am 34 years old, not 27. So this can't be me.



2)  I am not the designer of a revolutionary electric and plug-in hybrid/electric vehicle called the Aptera. This guy is...

Jason Hill and his Aptera

I have to admire the space-age technology and design of this eco-friendly vehicle, but I can only admire it. I can't be proud of it, because I didn't design it. And I can't get one, because I couldn't afford it. Nope, this guy is definitely not me.



3)  Though I am redheaded and have visited Minnesota, I am not an assistant professor in Bioproducts and Biosystems Engineering at the University of Minnesota. This guy is...

Jason Hill, with some plants

Truthfully, I don't know the first thing about Bioproducts, or Biosystems, or even Engineering for that matter. And I didn't get my undergraduate degree in Biology at Harvard College, either. So this is most likely not me, either.



4)  I am not the host of Chef Tips, one of YouTube's most popular cooking shows. This guy is...

Chef Jason Hill, food know-it-all

It's all I can do to whip up a batch of spaghetti, an occasional Hamburger Helper, and maybe – on a good day – a sautéed chicken entree. Giving cooking tips on an online cooking show? Nope, not me.



5)  I am not a photographer and English teacher in Japan. This guy is...

Jason Hill, photographer

Although I do occasionally like to look up and to the left for no apparent reason, I am only an amateur photographer. And the closest I've ever gotten to teaching English is yelling at my Kindle to an author who can't hear me upon encountering a plethora of unconscionable grammatical and spelling errors. Also, I've never even visited Japan. So this can't be me, either.



6)  I am not now – nor was I ever – the lead singer and guitarist for a (now-defunct) rock band called Louis XIV. This guy is/was...

Jason Hill (2nd from left) with members of Louis XIV

While I do play the guitar a little bit and enjoy singing, I do not now – nor did I ever – live in Paris, France, where this band originally formed. Nor would I ever give any album I produced the inane title of Slick Dogs And Ponies. So, I'm pretty sure that this is also not me.



7)  I am not the Associate Professor and Director of the Teaching Practicum at DePaul University. This guy is...

Jason Hill: ethicist, philosopher, and theorist

I was not educated at Purdue University; it was East Carolina University for me. My areas of specialization are not ethics, social and political philosophy, or race theory. And while I am putting the finishing touches on two books currently, they are not titled The Cosmopolitan Social Contract or A Dictatorship Of Virtue: Global Norms In A Multicultural World. So, I will have to keep looking for myself, because this is certainly not me either.



8)  I am not a film and television actor whose resume includes guest spots on series such as Breaking Bad, Into The West, and The Witching Hour. This guy is...

Jason Hill, working actor

While I am a bit of an amateur actor (mostly at church and once in community theater), I have never appeared in any film or television show. Mostly, this is because no one would want me to. I am not photogenic. So this person also cannot be me.



9)  I am not a PGA golfer and winner of the 2001 Steamtown Classic. This guy is...

Jason Hill, still gloating about that one win 11 years ago

For one, I don't even like golf. I don't like to watch it, and the one time I played it, I also didn't find it to be much fun. Besides that, I don't know where Steamtown is, or what makes it "classic." So I can only conclude that this fellow is also not me.



10)  I am a blogger and advertising copy writer/editor. I do have red hair and a beard. This guy....

Jason Hill, blogger

...could quite possibly be me. Let's see, what does it say about him? "I'm not who I am. I'm not who I seem." Hmm, maybe I've made a mistake. "I'm somebody else." Yes, I've definitely made a mistake. Reading on... "Who am I really?" Huh, even he doesn't know who he is. Well, I guess I'll keep looking....