Friday, December 7, 2012

Things I Find Fascinating: Strange Christmas Albums

If you could read the track names on this album, I'll bet you'd find
Christmas classics such as "We Wish You A Merry Chicken,"
"Colonel Sanders Is Coming To Town," "White Chicken," 
and the ever-popular "Rockin' Around The Chicken Bucket."



Christmas with Slim Whitman looks like it would involve leather
couches, several boxes of cigars, and lots and lots of billards games.



Apparently, Afroman's dreaming of a drunk Christmas...



There is such a thing as too much green. Why, Gomer, why?



I think he needs both a dentist and an ophthalmologist.
Those eyes aren't gonna uncross themselves, ya know.



Featuring the "hit" song, "What Can You Get A
Wookiee For Christmas (When He's Already Got A
Comb)?" Seriously, you can't make this stuff up...



I don't even think I want to know...



I don't see a rope anywhere. But to each his own, I suppose...



What could be possibly creepier than an extreme close-up
photo of an extremely ugly and extremely creepy man?



I guess this answers my question...a jolly man proudly
wielding his Christmas sausages. Talk about Weirdsville!



While we're on an oddball European kick, here's a timeless
Christmas "classic" from the one-and-only Heino. Blonde
wig, stylin' shades, and snazzy blue sweater sold separately.



And another classic from Jan Gorissen. Nothing says Merry
Christmas like an entire album of accordion music!



No....just....no.



Put on your dancin' shoes. It's Christmastime, baby!



Just what I've always wanted. A mirror ball Christmas tree!



Good song. Unnecessarily kitschy album cover.



Someone tell that kid it's against the rules to grab Santa
Claus's bag like that. There could be breakables in there!



There is a plethora of poodles in this picture.



What the Holly Jolly Christmas is all this about?



I can think of a lot better places to spend my Christmas than
Death Row. In an electric chair. With a hood over my face.



This is Rodney on the Roq wishing you a Merry 
Christmas and a Happy New Year. And as for you,
Marian A. Bingenheimer, thanks for the memories!



Stan and Doug "yust" need to get better costume designers. Ick!



And a Merry Makeup Christmas to you, too, Glam Rock Santa.



You'd think as successful as he's been throughout his career
that Jimmy Buffett could've afforded a bigger boat than this.



No offense, Ray, but if you're driving that 
sleigh, I won't be riding in it with you!

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