"My name is Jonas
I'm carrying the wheel
Thanks for all you've shown us
But this is how we feel…"
"My girl's got a big mouth
With which she blabbers a lot
She laughs at most everything
Whether it's funny or not…"
"What's with these homies dissing my girl?
Why do they gotta front?
What did we ever do to these guys
That made them so violent?"
Is crowdin' my icebox
Somebody's cold one
Is givin' me chills…"
"You are 18-year-old girl
Who live in small city of Japan
And you heard me on the radio
About one year ago…"
"When I look in the mirror
I can't believe what I see
Tell me, who's that funky dude
Staring back at me?"
"You half-Japanese girls
Do it to me every time
Oh, the redhead said you shred the cello
And I'm Jello, baby…"
"Gothic flavor, how I miss you
If I only once could kiss you…"
"Take a listen around you
All the people that crowd around in your house
They be wantin'
To kill you in your sleep…"
"Where I come from isn't all that great
My automobile is a piece of crap
My fashion sense is a little whack
And my friends are just as screwy as me…"
"They say I need some Rogaine to put in my hair
Work out at the gym to fit my underwear
Oakley makes the shades to transform a tool
You'd hate for the kids to think that you've lost your cool…"
"When I was younger
I used to go and tip cows for fun, yeah
Actually I didn't do that
'Cuz I didn't want the cows to be sad…"
"I've been watching you, girl, from the back of my car
I see you're unsure of the place that you are
Groceries spillin' up out of your bag
Thinkin' you'll end up a penniless hag…"
"How am I going to
Deliver you a mountain size of love?
How do oceans connected by a straw
Get something through?"
"The moon was shining on the lake at night
The Slayer t-shirt fit the scene just right
Your smeared mascara
I looked into your eyes and saw a light…"
"I thought tonight would suck like every other night
I'd party with my friends
But when I saw you grooving on the dance floor
Normal came to an end…"
"I told you that you would put on some weight
You went out with somebody named Kevin Green
You preferred to go to a volleyball game
I told you that you couldn't be more lame…"
"I have a friend and it's an earthworm
It burrows underground deep within the soil
Sometimes when it rains it comes out
and we talk about our day…"
"Everyone, everyone, everyone, everyone, yeah
Everyone, everyone, everyone, everyone, yeah
Suck a thumb, suck a thumb, suck a thumb
Suck that thumb, yeah…"
"Darling, I'm afraid to close my eyes
When I'm going to bed
I'm afraid you'll crack the phone
Down over my head…"