Best First Lines Of Weezer Songs

It's often been said that, in advertising or entertainment, you should "grab" the listener/viewer/reader with something that'll catch their attention from the get-go. The band Weezer is very good at this. Here's a smattering of the first few lines of some of their songs that are memorably ear-catching. Enjoy!  ~  JH

"My name is Jonas

I'm carrying the wheel

Thanks for all you've shown us

But this is how we feel…"

"My girl's got a big mouth

With which she blabbers a lot

She laughs at most everything

Whether it's funny or not…"

"What's with these homies dissing my girl?

Why do they gotta front?

What did we ever do to these guys

That made them so violent?"

"Somebody's hiney

Is crowdin' my icebox

Somebody's cold one

Is givin' me chills…"

"You are 18-year-old girl

Who live in small city of Japan

And you heard me on the radio

About one year ago…"

"When I look in the mirror

I can't believe what I see

Tell me, who's that funky dude

Staring back at me?"

"You half-Japanese girls

Do it to me every time

Oh, the redhead said you shred the cello

And I'm Jello, baby…"

"Gothic flavor, how I miss you

If I only once could kiss you…"

"Take a listen around you

All the people that crowd around in your house

They be wantin'

To kill you in your sleep…"

"Where I come from isn't all that great

My automobile is a piece of crap

My fashion sense is a little whack

And my friends are just as screwy as me…"

"They say I need some Rogaine to put in my hair

Work out at the gym to fit my underwear

Oakley makes the shades to transform a tool

You'd hate for the kids to think that you've lost your cool…"

"When I was younger

I used to go and tip cows for fun, yeah

Actually I didn't do that

'Cuz I didn't want the cows to be sad…"

"I've been watching you, girl, from the back of my car

I see you're unsure of the place that you are

Groceries spillin' up out of your bag

Thinkin' you'll end up a penniless hag…"

"How am I going to

Deliver you a mountain size of love?

How do oceans connected by a straw

Get something through?"

"The moon was shining on the lake at night

The Slayer t-shirt fit the scene just right

Your smeared mascara

I looked into your eyes and saw a light…"

"I thought tonight would suck like every other night

I'd party with my friends

But when I saw you grooving on the dance floor

Normal came to an end…"

"I told you that you would put on some weight

You went out with somebody named Kevin Green

You preferred to go to a volleyball game

I told you that you couldn't be more lame…"

"I have a friend and it's an earthworm

It burrows underground deep within the soil

Sometimes when it rains it comes out

and we talk about our day…"

"Everyone, everyone, everyone, everyone, yeah

Everyone, everyone, everyone, everyone, yeah

Suck a thumb, suck a thumb, suck a thumb

Suck that thumb, yeah…"

"Darling, I'm afraid to close my eyes

When I'm going to bed

I'm afraid you'll crack the phone

Down over my head…"

A Literal Interpretation Of Snoop Dogg's "Who Am I (What's My Name?)"

We've been down this road before, but for the uninitiated, here is a word-for-word "translation," as it were, of a popular hip-hop song from the past. Illuminated in this way, one can see the rampant vulgarity, self-stereotypes, and thoroughly insipid lyrics prominent throughout the song – and, by extension, throughout the genre of mainstream hip-hop. Granted, not all artists' songs are like this. But TOO many are. Enjoy?  ~  JH

BLOGGER'S NOTE: If you're interested in comparing the two (and/or you are not familiar with the song, the original (explicit) lyrics can be found here.

"Who Am I (What's My Name)?"

by Snoop Dogg

INTRO:

[...A bunch of "words" that really aren't words at all…]

The Dogg Pound is at this location (the explosive device)

The Dogg Pound is at this location

Snoop Doggy Dogg (the explosive device)

Snoopy Doggy Dogg (Dogg)

VERSE 1:

From the depths of the sea, back to the neighborhood

Snoop Doggy Dogg, awesome, yes, but a protégé of Dr. Dre

I became a solo act on those buttocks, but there is no difference

Long Beach is the area from which I originate

Follow me, follow me, follow me, follow me

But be sure to keep a firm grip

1993 is the year for me to mess things up

So I am keeping nothing in reserve

And, incestuous fellow, I have five dollars on the twenty-dollar batch of marijuana

It is like that, and as a matter of fact (rat-tat-tat-tat)

Because I never hesitate to help an African-American lie down for a little while

Yes, so take a look at the manuscript

You see that it is necessary for us to talk about being gangsters

What is my incestuous name?

CHORUS:

Snoop Doggy Dogg (yes, yes, yes)

Snoop Doggy Dogg (the explosive device)

[...A bunch of "words" that really aren't words at all…]

(Dogg)

VERSE 2:

It's the front of the ship to the exclamation of amazement

Stealthily advancing – yes, you all

Snoop Doggy Dogg is in the incestuous house practically every day

Having bowel movements with my African-American associate, Mr. Dr. Dre

As I said before, African-Americans cannot trifle with this

And African-Americans cannot trifle with that

Excrement that I drop, because you know it never ends

Mr. 1-8-7 on an incestuous law enforcement officer

Tic-toc, never a Glock, just some African-Americans and a rooster

Stealing from incestuous individuals, then I murder them bloodily

Then I step through the fog and creep through the smog

Because I'm Snoop Doggy (who?) Doggy (what?) Doggy (Dogg)

CHORUS:

Snoop Doggy Dogg (yes, yes, yes)

Snoop Doggy Dogg (the explosive device)

[...A bunch of "words" that really aren't words at all…] (the explosive device)

[...A bunch of "words" that really aren't words at all…]

VERSE 3:

Now extend your hands toward the incestuous sky

And wave them around apathetically

Yes, roll a marijuana joint and pour an alcoholic beverage

And watch where you step, because Doggy is stealing things

My bank account has a considerably high balance

My excrement is very successful and legitimate

At this time, I am currently on parole, and I like to stroll

With the Dogg Pound trailing behind me

And in the company of your female companion

Is where you are likely to find me

Lying around, acting like a gangster

She wants the African-American with the largest supply of salty snacks

And guess what? He is I, and I am him

Slim with the tilted brim

What is my incestuous name?

CHORUS:

Snoop Doggy Dogg (the explosive device)

Snoop Doggy Dogg 

Snoop Doggy Dogg (the explosive device)

Snoop Doggy Dogg (Dogg)

[...A bunch of "words" that really aren't words at all…] 

[...A bunch of "words" that really aren't words at all…] (the explosive device)

[...A bunch of "words" that really aren't words at all…]

[...A bunch of "words" that really aren't words at all…] (the explosive device)

[...A bunch of "words" that really aren't words at all…] (the explosive device)

Doggy Dogg, Doggy Dogg, Doggy Dogg

[...A bunch of "words" that really aren't words at all…] (the explosive device)

What is his name? Snoop Dogg and the Dogg Pound

(Dogg) (the explosive device)

Oh, Snoopy Dogg, Snoopy Dogg, Snoopy Dogg (the explosive device)

Yes, yes (Dogg), I know his name

Come on, Snoopy, come on, Snoopy (the explosive device)

And the Dogg Pound

Snoopy Dogg (the explosive device) 

Snoopy Dogg, Snoopy Dogg (Dogg)

(Dogg, Nasty Dogg, Doggy Dogg)