Friday, September 14, 2012

My 15 Favorite 1980s Sitcoms

Lately, I've been reliving my childhood and re-watching a lot of the old sitcoms from the 1980s that I grew up enjoying. So I decided to make a list of my 15 favorites, more or less in descending order of my preference for them. To narrow my focus as much as possible, I only included my favorite sitcoms that aired for at least half of their total run during the 1980s – some of these started in the '70s and continued into the '80s, while others started in the '80s and continued into the '90s. However, if a popular show started or ended at the beginning or end of the '80s and enjoyed a longer run in the previous or next decade, it is not included in this list, no matter how good it may have been. Reminisce and enjoy!



15)  GROWING PAINS:  No, I didn't watch this show for the same reason a lot of girls my age did (i.e., to gawk at Kirk Cameron). I did, however, enjoy the family dynamics of this show. The idea of a family with a working mother and a stay-at-home dad was pretty unconventional, even in the mid-'80s. Though Jason (the dad – great name, by the way) did work as a psychiatrist, he did so from his own home, all the while overseeing the household, which includes Mike the troublemaker, Carol the honors student, rambunctious Ben, and (later) the precocious Chrissy. And yes, that is Leonardio DiCaprio on the far right – he joined the cast as a regular in the later seasons of the show.




14)  NIGHT COURT:  This kooky comedy was set during the night shift of a Manhattan court, presided over by the young, unorthodox Harry Stone, judge and amateur magician. Brutally honest public defender Christine Sullivan, sleazy prosecutor Dan Fielding, dim-witted bailiff Bull, surly bailiff Roz, and easy-going court clerk Mac Robinson rounded out the primary cast. Alternately hilarious and bizarre, the show was always fun to watch thanks in large part to its memorable characters.




13)  THE FACTS OF LIFE:  This classic sitcom focused on Edna Garrett, housemother and dietitian at the fictional Eastland School, an all-female boarding skill in Peekskill, New York. The girls in Mrs. Garrett's care included spoiled rich girl Blair Warner; young, gossipy Tootie Ramsey; overweight, impressionable Natalie Green; and tough, streetwise-but-vulnerable Jo Polniaczek. Though I was quite  young when this show was in its original run, and I never saw it in syndication, I can still fondly remember many of the characters very well.




12)  LAVERNE & SHIRLEY:  I have to admit that I watched this show more in syndication than I did when it was in its original run. I've probably seen every episode at least a couple of times. A spin-off of Happy Days (another one of my favorites, but more of a 1970s show), the show follows the lives of roommates Laverne De Fazio and Shirley Feeney, who work at the Shotz Brewery in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. Laverne's a tough-talking tomboy, while Shirley's perky and positive. Lovable goof Lenny and his obnoxious, greasy pal Squiggy are constantly pestering the girls, while Carmine "The Big Ragu" Ragusa carries on an on-again, off-again romance with Shirley. Kookiness and mayhem abound.




11)  CHEERS:  I never really watched this show in its original run, but I did catch enough episodes of it in syndication to see what all the fuss was about. Turns out that it was a really good show, driven by a large cast of unforgettable characters. The show is set in the Cheers bar in Boston, a place where a group of locals meet to drink, relax, chat, and have fun. If you've seen the show, there's no need for me to explain who Sam, Diane, Rebecca, Coach, Carla, Cliff, Woody, Frasier, Norm, and Lilith are, because you already know. If you never watched the show, watch it – it would take me too long to explain.




10)  BENSON:  Now this one takes me back – way back! This show ended when I was eight, but it replayed enough in syndication that I still remember it vividly. When the show began, Benson DuBois had just been hired as the head of household affairs for the scatterbrained and widowed Governor Eugene Gatling and his daughter. Katie. The show revolved around Benson's housekeeping dilemmas, his fights with the German cook Gretchen Kraus, and his interactions with the governor's chief of staff, Clayton Endicott III. The governor's secretary, Marcy, and her successor, Denise, and the press secretary Pete were also major characters throughout the run of the series.




9)  FAMILY TIES:  This was the sitcom that propelled the wonderfully talented Michael J. Fox to superstardom. The show follows the lives of the Keaton family: liberal Baby Boomer ex-hippies Steven and Elyse, their enthusiastic young Republican son, Alex P. Keaton (you have to say the entire name, of course); air-headed, materialistic Mallory; athletic tomboy, Jennifer; and (later) the youngest son, Andrew. Memorable supporting cast members included Alex's friend and neighbor Skippy and Mallory's artist boyfriend, Nick.




8)  WHO'S THE BOSS?:  So, here's the setup. Retired major league baseball player Tony Micelli relocates to Fairfield, Connecticut, to be uptight, divorced ad executive Angela Bower's live-in housekeeper. Mix in Tony's streetwise tomboy daughter Samantha, Angela's awkward son Jonathan, and her feisty sexpot mother Mona, and chaos is bound to ensue. And it does – frequently.




7)  DESIGNING WOMEN:  This delightfully Southern-flavored comedy centered on the working and personal lives of four women and one man at an interior design firm in Atlanta. Elegant, outspoken liberal intellectual Julia Sugarbaker and her rich, flashy, self-centered former beauty queen sister, Suzanne own the business, although Julia is the only one of the two who actually does any work. Pragmatic designer Mary Jo Shively, sweet-natured but naive office manager Charlene Frazier Stillfield, and falsely convicted ex-con Anthony Bouvier round out the primary cast. The Sugarbakers' absent-minded friend Bernice Clifton also appears frequently. I appreciated (and still appreciate) this show for being one of the first – and still one of very few – shows to portray Southerners as anything other than ignorant, stupid, and hopelessly backwoodsy.




6)  NEWHART:  Bob Newhart has always been one of my favorite comedians. His popular 1970s sitcom, The Bob Newhart Show, remains one of my favorites. This quirky New England-based comedy is also among my all-time favorites. The show is set in a small, rural Vermont town where how-to author (and later TV talk show host) Dick Loudon owns and operates the 200-year-old Stratford Inn with his frequently-sweater-wearing wife Joanna. Dim-witted handyman George Utley, spoiled little rich girl/hotel maid Stephanie Vanderkellen, her hyperactive yuppie beau (and later husband) Michael Harris, and eccentric backwoodsmen brothers Larry (the only one who actually speaks), Darryl, and Darryl round out the oddball cast of characters.




5)  THE GOLDEN GIRLS:  This delightfully subversive sitcom centered on the lives of four older women who shared a home in Miami, Florida. Substitute teacher Dorothy Zbornak moved to Miami after divorcing her husband of 38 years (who had cheated on her with a much younger woman). Sweet but naive grief counselor Rose Nylund moved to Miami upon the death of her husband. Southern belle Blanche Devereaux, a widowed mother of six who has a seemingly voracious appetite for any man with a pulse, owns the house where they all live. Dorothy's octogenarian mother Sophia Petrillo moves in with her daughter and the other ladies after her retirement home burned down. This show was important for a number of reasons, not the least of which was that it portrayed older women who still led active lives and, yes, even had romances at an age when society would say that life had already passed them by.




4)  ALF:  I know, I probably shouldn't like this show as much as I do – but I do. Even though it only lasted four seasons (a tragedy!), this was one of my absolute favorite shows growing up. As the series begins, Gordon Shumway, a friendly extraterrestrial from the planet Melmac, crashes his spaceship into the garage of the Tanner family. Willie Tanner and his wife, Kate, don't know what to make of this strange visitor, but their kids, Lynn and Brian, instantly fall in love with ALF, the nickname they give the furry little guy (it stands for Alien Life Form). ALF is constantly getting himself (and the Tanners) into trouble by accidentally revealing himself to neighbors, friends, and complete strangers, and by causing an inordinate number of household accidents. But the wise-cracking alien is so full of joy, the Tanners can't help but do all they can to protect him and keep his existence a secret. The silly, sometimes oddball humor that permeates throughout this series is right up my alley. I'll probably always love it!




3)  THE JEFFERSONS:  This long-running sitcom focused on an upwardly mobile African-American couple, George and Louise Jefferson, who had moved on up to the East Side. Aside from the Jeffersons, the primary cast consisted of their friends and neighbors, including: biracial couple, Tom and Helen Willis; the Jeffersons' son, Lionel, and his wife Jenny (the Willis' daughter); their quirky English neighbor, Mr. Bentley; the tip-hungry doorman, Ralph; George's outspoken matriarch, Mother Jefferson; and, of course, the Jeffersons' back-talking, wise-cracking housekeeper, Florence Johnston. Sometimes unrealistic, occasionally unpleasant, but always entertaining!




2)  TAXI:  This extremely well-written, well-acted sitcom was centered around the everyday lives of a handful of New York City taxi drivers and their verbally abusive dispatcher. Sensible, pragmatic Alex Rieger was the one everyone else turned to for advice. Struggling actor Bobby Wheeler was a target of Louie's derision. Morally deficient dispatcher Louie De Palma belittles and insults his drivers constantly. Divorced mother-of-two Elaine Nardo tries to cope with the stresses of driving a cab while trying to realize her ambitions in the field of fine art. Sweet-natured but dim-witted boxer (and cabbie) Tony Banta gets knocked out time and time again, but refuses to quit until the boxing commission takes away his license. "Reverend" Jim Ignatowski is a burned-out relic of the '60s who lives in a world of his own, though he occasionally imparts surprising words of wisdom to his fellow cabbies. Quirky foreigner Latka Gravas works as a mechanic, fixing the taxis, while speaking in a strange language that no one understands and telling oddball stories about his homeland. This one's been off the air for nearly as long as I've been alive, but I've seen every episode multiple times in syndication, and I never get tired of them.




1)  THE COSBY SHOW:  Last but certainly not least, my favorite sitcom of the 1980s (and quite possibly of all time). This wildly popular sitcom focused on the Huxtable family, an affluent African-American family living in a brownstone in Brooklyn Heights, New York. The Huxtable family initially consisted of obstetrician/dad Heathcliff (aka "Cliff); attorney/mom Clair; and their five children – somewhat-aloof Sondra (who married Elvin and had twins, Nelson and Winnie); fashion-forward Denise (who married Martin and inherited stepdaughter, Olivia); ne'er-do-well Theo (the only Huxtable son); frequently misguide Vanessa; and ever-precocious Rudy. This show was also important for a number of reasons, not the least of which is that it broke then-traditional racial stereotypes by portraying African-Americans who were educated and successful. Cliff and Clair were also one heck of a good example for good parenting. Oh, and did I mention that the show is laugh-out-loud funny every single episode? No? Well, it is. Even now.






BLOGGER'S NOTE:  For the sake of making it easier on myself, I have "ripped off" the majority of these synopses (sans my own commentary) directly from the shows' respective Wikipedia pages. Credit is due to their authors, though they are unknown, but I didn't feel like putting quotation marks around everything.

Thursday, September 13, 2012

"Understood (You)," "Mellowing," And "Out In Left Field": Three New Drabbles


Here are three new drabbles. Maybe you will enjoy them. Maybe you won't. Either way, here they are....



UNDERSTOOD (YOU)"

Took the car and the kids and the puppy and left. Said it would be better this way. Said it would all make sense later. It's later, and I don't. I blamed. And I blamed myself. I loved. I thought. Did too? This is the hardest thing I've ever. Think about it, okay? Try! I still love. I know. Better than. Know. Self. Don't want this. Not for me. Not for the kids. And not for. Care more than. Let on. Not only hurting me. Hurting others. And hurting. Come back. I need. I want. I love. I don't understand...



"MELLOWING"

Five years ago, you would have never left here alive. When I found out what you did, when you had the guts – or should I say, the stupidity – to admit what you did, I'd have tracked you down, tied you up, beaten you to within an inch of your life, made you beg for mercy, then choked the life out of you anyway – because I could. And even if I'd let you live, if I'd shown such unmitigated mercy, you'd wish you were dead. Death would be less painful. But that's not who I am anymore. You see, I'm mellowing.



"OUT IN LEFT FIELD"

Coach didn't know what he was doing putting me out here. I'm a liability, not an asset. I have poor instincts, I'm not fast enough, I throw left-handed, and I get bored easily. This can only end in heartache. Or heartburn, as it were. Maybe if I prove my worth, do nothing when much is expected, fail when success is the only option, maybe then he'll see. That he made a mistake. (Not cutting me from the team was his first mistake.) I'll do my worst and reap the consequences. He'll have a gut feeling his gut feeling was wrong.

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Songs (And Bands) With States In The Titles: Part 3 Of 5

In case you couldn't tell by the title, this is the 3rd in a mini-series of posts where I am posting a song (or a band) with a U.S. state in the title. I'm going through the states alphabetically. If you're just starting here, you may want to back up and catch the earlier installments. Part 1 goes from Alabama to Georgia, and you can read it here. Part 2 spans from Hawaii to Maryland, and you can read it here. Today's installment will include the next 10 states, from Massachusetts to New Jersey. As before, I have included actual video links for each song (or band) whenever possible. Enjoy!


21)  MASSACHUSETTS:  Let's kick things off with the simply titled "Massachusetts" by the Bee Gees, pre-disco era (i.e., the 1960s). A simple, folksy tune that ought to make any homegrown Bay Stater lonesome for their birthplace.




22)  MICHIGAN:  Next up, a nice tribute to the state of Michigan by the Red Hot Chili Peppers, written by frontman and native Michiganian, Anthony Kiedis. It's called "Especially In Michigan"...




23)  MINNESOTA:  Here's a little ditty called "Minnesota Girl" by Green Day lead singer Billie Joe Armstrong. It's a surprisingly mellow and sweet tune from a normally raucous rocker...




24)  MISSISSIPPI:  There's no shortage of songs about the state of Mississippi. But I narrowed it down to just one, "Mississippi Queen" by a band called Mountain. I have no clue what the singer's saying (screaming?) for most of the song, but every now and then you are able to make out the words "Mississippi Queen"...I think. Good electric guitar and bass riffs, though...




25)  MISSOURI:  'Bout time we had a state-named band in this mix, huh? Here's "Movin' On" by the rock band Missouri...




26)  MONTANA:  This one's sure to please a few of my younger readers and annoy everybody else – especially anyone reading this who happens to be from Montana. Oh, well! Here's "The Best Of Both Worlds" by Hannah Montana...




27)  NEBRASKA:  Okay, so maybe this one will make up for that last one. Maybe not. Regardless, here's a song called "Nebraska" by Bruce Springsteen...




28)  NEVADA:  This song has more to do with the guy's lost love than it does the state of Nevada, but it fits the basic criteria. Here's "So On, Nevada" by Damien Jurado...




29)  NEW HAMPSHIRE:  Jason Reeves gives mad props to girls from New Hampshire in this lo-fi pop song, titled simply "New Hampshire"...




30)  NEW JERSEY:  This swingin' little number, sung by John Pizzarelli, is called "I Like Jersey Best." I know, I know, there's no "New" in the title. But let's not get technical here – the "New" is obviously implied. Just listen to the song – it's all about New Jersey...

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

9/11 Tribute: Words You Can Make Using Letters From The Words "September Eleventh"


Eleven years ago on this date, terrorists invaded our country and thousands of innocent lives were lost. This small list of words, each of which can be made using letters from the words "September Eleventh", is dedicated to the memory of those who died as well as to those who played a significant part in ensuring that many others survived.


1)  HELPERS:  People that give help, assistance, support, etc. So many people – professionals and lay people working side by side – gave of themselves that fateful day to help the injured and dying, and to comfort those who had lost loved ones.







2)  HELMETS:  343 firefighters and paramedics, 23 NYPD officers, and 37 Port Authority police officers lost their lives on 9/11. That's a lot of empty helmets...





3)  TEMPERS:  Tempers flared when we realized our country was under attack. We wanted revenge for those who died. We wanted the masterminds behind the perpetrators of this awful crime to be punished.





4)  PRETEENS:  Often overlooked in the faceless death counts of 9/11 is the fact that several children (eight by most accounts) died in this tragedy. Three of them were preteens, just 11 years old each.

Asia Cottom

Bernard Curtis Brown II

Rodney Dickens



5)  EMBERS:  Just hours after the attacks, all that was left of the majestic Twin Towers were thousands of pounds of rubble and debris...and burning embers.









6)  VEHEMENT:  Passionate; opinionated; angry; ardent; earnest; fervent; forceful; impassioned; intense; powerful; vicious; zealous. There was much vehement debate on both sides about who was responsible for the events of 9/11, what we as a nation should do in response, and what the consequences of such a response could be.








7)  TREMBLE:  1. Shake; vibrate; quake; quiver; rock; shudder; teeter; wobble.  2. Hide; hover in fear; cringe; flinch; recoil; shrink; wince.  Though the walls of the World Trade Center and the Pentagon may have trembled (Meaning #1) and even fallen after being impacted by jet planes, America did not tremble (Meaning #2) in response to this act of terrorism. We fought back.






POSTSCRIPT:  The following items are almost completely irrelevant to the somber theme of today's post (with the exception of the first one). But just in case you need your mood lightened a bit today, here are some oddly interesting anagrams you can making using the entire phrase "September Eleventh"...


1)  REV SENT BE HELPMEET




2)  THE BEEP NEVER MELTS




3)  NEVER BE HELMET PETS



4)  BET HE NEVER PELTS ME

Monday, September 10, 2012

The Ten Best Books I've Read (So Far) This Year


I typically read well over a hundred books each year, of varying lengths and genres, in paperback, hardcover, e-books, and audiobooks. Some books are instantly forgettable, while others are enjoyable but aren't "great." Here are the ten best books I've read so far this year, in no particular order...




1)  GREEN RIVER, RUNNING RED by Ann Rule.  A fascinating account that delves deep (maybe a little too deep) into the mind of a vicious serial killer who got away with his gruesome crimes for nearly twenty years before finally being apprehended. Rule writes true stories better than some novelists write fiction. It's a gripping, horrifying, and unforgettable account.




2)  WHERE YOU LIVED: STORIES by Tod Goldberg.  An unusual collection of short stories by an author I'd never read previously. Simple in theme yet profoundly written, Goldberg's stories are worth reading time and time again. And I will probably do so.




3)  THE HUNGER GAMES by Suzanne Collins.  With the ever-increasing popularity of teen fiction books in recent years, it's hard to come up with a story that's truly original and then to be able to tell it very well. Suzanne Collins does just that in the first book in her series. I know I'm a little behind on these, but it was well worth the wait for me to read it, and I will definitely be reading the rest of the series.




4)  THINGS TO DO WHILE AVOIDING THINGS TO DO by Mark J. Asher.  This hilarious book of to-don't lists is far from high literature, and the "suggestions" made by the author are not really advisable to put into practice. But the book is definitely well worth the read. For example, from a list called "Time Management For The Time-Insensitive": "1. Understand that time is always slipping away – anything you forget to do will soon be forgotten.  2. A series of 15-minute breaks can clear your head and improve your work performance.  3. Allow yourself plenty of time to meander, ponder, and play..."  And it just gets worse and worse from there.




5)  SIDE EFFECTS by Woody Allen.  I've always been a fan of Woody Allen's movies. You either love his unique brand of humor or you hate it. There are few people familiar with his work that sit on the fence in this regard. I'm in the "love" category, though my wife is in the "hate" category. I'd never read any of Allen's books prior to this one, but I will most certainly be checking out his other ones. My style of short-story writing is eerily similar to Woody's, though I didn't know that going into it.




6)  THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO by Stieg Larsson.  It's rare that a thriller – or a mystery, for that matter – makes me think as much as this one did. It's not an easy read – some truly horrifying things happen to some of the characters (no spoilers!) – but the payoff is exceptional. I am already reading the second book, and the third one is next up after that.




7)  NUTJOB: A SQUIRREL'S DOZEN SECRET TIPS TO PRODUCTIVITY by Micah Moss.  This was not only humorous, but actually useful. I jotted down a ton of notes while reading it. Basically, the author observed the habits of squirrels in his free time and made appropriate analogies as to how he – and we – might increase productivity at work and at life in similar ways.




8)  THE LIVING END: A MEMOIR OF FORGETTING AND FORGIVING by Robert Leleux.  A powerful memoir chronicling the latter years of the author's grandmother's life. She and her daughter (the author's mother) had had a broken relationship for many, many years, but upon the grandmother's diagnosis of and gradual decline from Alzheimer's disease, the two restored their familial bonds and made amends. This insightful, highly emotional book is also extremely well-written by Leleux, who was BFF's with his grandmother growing up. (I can relate.)




9)  EXTREMELY LOUD & INCREDIBLY CLOSE by Jonathan Safran Foer.  I've already gushed enough about this book in a previous post, so I won't rehash my review here. Needless to say, this one goes right to the top of my list for best books I've read this year. I'm told that the film version of this was subpar, to say the least – I haven't seen it, so I don't know. But I definitely recommend reading the book.




10)  THE SOLOIST by Steve Lopez.  The true story of a journalist who befriends a schizophrenic cellist living on Skid Row and attempts to help the man better his life. I know they made a movie out of this one, too, but I haven't seen it either. The book was phenomenal, though.

Sunday, September 9, 2012

11 Things I Hate

I'm keeping it simple today. Here goes.

I HATE...

BEING FALSELY ACCUSED OF SOMETHING


RACISM (And Any Other Form Of Prejudice Or Discrimination)


MUD-SLINGING POLITICS


SENSELESS KILLINGS (Terrorism, Massacres, School Shootings, Etc.)


THE PRICE OF GAS


STOPLIGHTS THAT TAKE FOREVER TO TURN GREEN


CRUELTY TO ANIMALS


WHEN PEOPLE CUT IN FRONT OF ME IN LINE


WATCHING GOLF ON TV


PEOPLE WHO TALK DURING MOVIES


LITTERING

Saturday, September 8, 2012

Poems For Your Perusal: Another Half-Stack Of Alpha Poetry

I started a new cycle of alpha poetry a few weeks back and posted it here, but never got around to finishing it. Till today, that is. Enjoy...


Not what it looks like
You were mistaken.
It's an illusion
This is not bacon!
A misunderstanding
It's easy to see
It looks and it tastes the same
But this is turkey!


Out with the new
Back to the old stuff.
Newfangled nonsense!
It's more than enough
To drive a man crazy.
He knows what he knows
And he don't want to change
'Less he's changing his clothes --
And there's nothing earth-shaking
In dispensing with those.


Pay as you go
But don't get behind.
See your way clear
But not if you're blind.
Don't borrow trouble
If you can't pay it back.
You may lack what you like
But don't like what you lack.


Quintessential
What you must have.
Second-guess it?
Bet you just have.
You didn't need it?
But you must have
And now it owns you.
That's called a habit.


Rearing its ugly head
Again
As though it never left.
They got it all
The first time
But, no.
Or they did
And it returned.
It's just sick
The way it sickens you.
Someday we will
Decapitate
The C Monster.


Save your excuses!
Don't try to amuse us
Attempt to abuse us
Or bruise us with ruses
Or simply accuse us.
You should know --
It's useless.


Tone-deaf symphony
I can't bear to listen.
It's music to someone
But to me, it's dissonant.
Wish I could dig it
But I just want to bury it.
What good's a tune
If the music can't carry it?


Undo the harness
And let yourself go.
If you return to yourself
Then you will know
That you were meant to be
Something important.
If you stay gone
Then it's good that you went.


Vice is nice
But for a season
Then you get
What you deserve.
But you miss
What you indulged in.
Better just to be reserved
And never to have
Gotten caught up
In a web that's hard to break.
Better to have learned your lesson
And never made that first mistake.


Whether you do
Or whether you don't
Depends on what
You really want.


X-shaped tombstone
What's the meaning?
Is it a cross
That's simply leaning?
Or is there something
More to this?
Or does the "x"
Just mean "x-ist"?


You're not trying hard enough.
If you were, you'd have made it by now.
You have only yourself to blame.


Zanier than me? Ha!
Why, it's unheard of!
But then I saw their faces
And I wasn't quite as certain.

Friday, September 7, 2012

today i refuse to capitalize (though i will punctuate)

if you know me very well at all, you already know that two of my biggest pet peeves are poor spelling and bad grammar. then why, pray tell, would i decide to type my entire blog post today without capitalizing a single letter? because it's friday, and because i feel like it. those may not be good reasons, but they're reasons, and i'm comfortable with them.

for those of you who like that sort of thing – although why i don't know – yes, this is one of those rambling posts where i spout off whatever comes to mind, with or without (usually without) any unified theme. for those of you who don't like that sort of thing – well, let's face it – you've come too far to turn back now, so you may as well hang with it. (or not: suit yourself.)

several people have asked me lately how my wife is doing, and how the pregnancy is coming along. hopefully, i answered you if you asked, but my response may have been truncated. so here's the full version, for those who care.

we will be twenty-three weeks pregnant as of tomorrow. which, if you believe thebump.com's baby size chart – and i do, mostly because i don't know any differently from personal experience – means that the baby is now roughly the size of a grapefruit. seeing as just a few weeks ago, when we first found out we were expecting, the size comparison was a blueberry, it hardly seems possible that this little life has multiplied in size that much, but apparently it's true.

mary is doing much better this week, both with the sciatic and back pain she was suffering from last week as well as with sleeping through the night. i mean, she still doesn't truly sleep through the night, but she hasn't been waking up in excruciating pain quite as often this week. hopefully, that will continue for awhile longer.

we went to the ob/gyn this past wednesday for a routine check-up. they checked her blood pressure, weight, drew blood, and all that jazz while i waited in the lobby. then, when we went back to see the midwife – who ended up being the only midwife at greenville ob/gyn that we hadn't previously met – she (the midwife) listened for the heartbeat, and found it. one-hundred-and-forty beats per minute, which i'm told is normal.

some of you have asked if we've picked out names yet. if you've asked me this personally, i may have been evasive in answering you. sorry, but that was by design. since we don't even know yet whether we're having a boy or a girl we don't want to get too attached to any names of either gender and go telling folks, in case: a) the name everyone ends up loving (or hating) ends up being for the opposite gender of what we're having, or b) we have a second child after this one (at some point), and still wish to use the name (or names) we didn't use for this baby.

for the curious (though i'm still not giving much away here), we do have three girls' names picked out that we like a lot, and one boy's name that we both agree on. the girls' names are easier for us to come up with, for some reason – maybe that means something, maybe it doesn't. we don't necessarily favor the trendy, most popular names you'll find in baby name books or on baby name websites. we don't particularly care for the hybridized, "made-up" names that some folks are using these days – not that there's anything wrong with those, they're just not for us. we tend to like more traditional names – and by traditional, i mean old-school. names that are easy to say, easy to spell, but that haven't been extraordinarily popular in quite some time.

though we're talking about them and thinking about them, we haven't actually shared the potential names with our family yet. we're not sure if we'll reveal his or her name to everyone prior to birth or not. i'm sure there are positives and negatives to that, but the positives may well outweigh the negatives. (opinions on this particular issue are welcomed, by the way.)

aside from baby stuff, i'm keeping quite busy organizing the fall drama production, as well as directing two of the four skits. in one of the two that i'm directing, i'm also acting – it's hard to do both, and i've had some outside help, but it's going pretty smoothly so far. i've been cultivating and practicing a british accent for my own amusement for well over twenty years now, and in this particular skit i will finally get to debut it before an audience (no pressure there, self!). i'm looking forward to this one, as it's quite humorous and lots of fun to rehearse as well.

the other skit i'm directing involves seven – count them, seven! – teenagers. for some folks (aside from middle-school and high-school teachers – this would be a nightmare to coordinate, but i'm a fairly patient person (so my wife says, at least) and i actually enjoy it. if the kiddos just goofed off and chattered the entire time, i'd be pulling my hair out, but they're actually doing great. i let them wind down from youth group for the first few minutes, get their chatter out, expend a little bit (but not too much) of their boundless energy, then get to work in earnest. and boy, do they work! can't wait to see this one come together!

i haven't talked much about my writing lately, because i haven't done much with my writing lately. i still plan to – at some point – release a collection of short stories and another collection of alpha poetry as e-books, but i haven't taken the time (free time? what free time?) to download the program to convert my writings into digital books yet. i'll get to it eventually – clearly, i have other stuff going on that's likely more important. like helping my wife bring a child into the world, for instance.

i'm still writing creatively, though – lately, my thing is drabbles, one-hundred-word short stories that very few people are reading (according to my blogger stats, at least) when i am posting them. maybe that means they're not that good. even so, once i've written enough of them to justify a short e-book (how many one-hundred-word stories justify a book? forty? fifty? a hundred?), i plan on collecting those as well. but that's several months down the road. and anyway, who will want to read it? probably very few people. but i digress...

i'm impressing myself with my formidable skills of self-suppression here. i have only had to backspace twice thus far because i accidentally capitalized something and i wasn't supposed to.

of course, if i have ever chatted with any of you on facebook, you probably already know that grammar (and sometimes punctuation and – dare i admit it? – spelling!) goes out the window when i'm chatting. chatting is fast-paced, and in order to keep up, you have to roll with the punches and dispense with the capital letters. that's just the way it goes. texting, on the other hand...

there are times when i have to respond quickly and succinctly on a text, and therefore capitalization and punctuation and even spelling out words in their entirety can and should be willfully ignored. but in most cases, i'm not really in a hurry to type a text, and so i generally will capitalize the first letter of each sentence, and will punctuate accordingly. i typically only abbreviate words like "u" and "b4" and "n2" if i'm running over on my hundred-and-sixty character limit.

i've been working on my "adapting to ever-changing conditions" skills at work this week. at least twice a day, my "priorities" have been shifted from what i was told was the most important copy to be written, to something else that is now the most important copy, which i then start on, but am forced to put aside again in lieu of the new most important copy. every time i get on a roll with something, i have to stop and start something else. i feel like i'm starting so many copy projects and finishing so few. i have finished some projects, but i couldn't tell you what copy i wrote exactly. i can only assure you that i finished the most important copy – whichever most important one it was.

today's my dad's birthday. i can't believe he's turning sixty-four today! he doesn't look it, salt-and-pepper-colored hair notwithstanding. he seems so young to me, though his health (he has diabetes) may sometimes belie that fact. i would like to end today's blog post by telling you how awesome my dad is. here goes. he's pretty stinkin' awesome! what more is there to say? that is all.