Per Your Suggestion: "Mario's Slimy Pants"

I had the (probably insane) idea yesterday to have my (wonderfully creative) Facebook friends suggest some crazy titles from which I might be able to write (somewhat coherent) stories. 

The response was pretty good (if slightly overwhelming), and I am now committed to the task of coming up with what promises to be some truly weird (probably insane) stuff. That's okay. I'm up for the challenge. (I might as well be, right?) 

First up, an original poem – sorry, not a story, per se, though it does tell a tale of sorts – based on a "crazy title" which was submitted by Cade and Claire Anderson via their mom, Julie Anderson. Hope y'all enjoy this one. If it elicits at least one giggle, it was worth the effort.  ~  JH

"MARIO'S SLIMY PANTS"

Mario sat sneezing, without covering his nose.

Now he's covered in snot from his knees to his toes.

Mario ate a sandwich, peanut butter and jelly.

But he dropped a big glop just below his big belly.

Mario made friends with a slug he called Cap

Now there's glistening trails all over Mario's lap.

Mario would like to change, if given the chance

For he finds that he's now wearing quite slimy pants!

Poems For Your Perusal #2: "I Give You Part"

This is another old poem I pulled out of my "vault"... I hope it speaks to you as it did to me upon rereading it.


"I GIVE YOU PART"

Lord, remove from me my ears
For I no longer wish to hear
The lies and gossip that they speak
Upon each hearing, I grow weak
And would, without Your guidance, take
Their lies as truth – a great mistake
And You reply, "Give me your heart"
And in response, I give You part.

Lord, remove my eyes from me
For I no longer wish to see
Images burned into my mind
Better off if I were blind
I would, without Your shielding hand
Be tempted to betray Your plan
You nod and say, "Give me your heart"
And once again, I give You part.

Lord, remove from me my lips
For often have I let things slip
A harsh or unkind word to them
That know You not – and in my sin
I fail to see, I'm failing You
When I say things that I don't do
You sigh and say, "Give me your heart"
And yet again, I give You part.

But something in this isn't right
I battle, yet I lose the fight
Could it be that I'm naive
Enough to think that I believe
That Your sufficiency of grace
Will put things in the proper place
And I won't have to give my heart
That You'll accept me, part by part?

Lord, I surrender – take my life
And make of it a sacrifice
That You and You alone shine through
Be glorified in all I do!
Without subtracting all of me
The whole of You is tragically
Subdued – and so for this my part
Lord Jesus, here – take ALL my heart!

Poems For Your Perusal – #1: "Not My Best Foot"

"Not My Best Foot"

This is not my best foot

But forward it must go

This is not my finest hour

But it will have to do.

I must be self-conscious

Aware of what I lack

The will to take what I can get

And give so little back.

This is not my legacy

For that will have to wait

This is simply honesty

But far too far from fate.

What I have to offer

Is rarely ribbon-worthy

I simply must express

Emote, release, if only for me.

I do not seek your honor

I do not want your prize

Though this is not my best foot,

I will not apologize.