Thursday, October 25, 2012

Things I Find Fascinating: The 10 Top-Selling Novels The Year I Was Born (1978)


A few weeks ago, I posted a list of the most popular movies the year I was born.  So I thought it only appropriate to make a list of the most popular books that year as well. Included with each title is a picture of the book's cover (the original, whenever available), and below it the opening paragraph from the book.

How many of these have you read? How many have you heard of? I'd heard of five of these before posting this list, but I haven't read a single one of them. Might be an interesting long-term project to read them, huh? I'll get back to you on that if I decide to. Enjoy...


1)  Chesapeake by James A. Michener


"For some time now they had been suspicious of him. Spies had monitored his movements, reporting to the priests, and in the tribal councils his advice against going to war with those beyond the bend had been ignored. Even more predictive, the family of the girl he had chosen to replace his dead wife had refused to accept the three lengths of roanoke he had offered as her purchase price."



2)  War And Remembrance by Herman Wouk


"A Liberty boat full of sleepy hung-over sailors came clanging alongside the U.S.S. Northampton, and a stocky captain in dress whites jumped out to the accommodation ladder. The heavy cruiser, its gray hull and long guns dusted pink by the rising sun, swung to a buoy in Pearl Harbor on the incoming tide. As the boat thrummed off toward the destroyer nests in West Loch, the captain trotted up the steep ladder and saluted the colors and the quarterdeck."



3)  Fools Die by Mario Puzo


"Listen to me. I will tell you the truth about a man's life. I will tell you the truth about his love for women. That he never hates them. Already you think I'm on the wrong track. Stay with me. Really – I'm a master of magic."



4)  Bloodline by Sidney Sheldon


"He was seated in the dark, alone, behind the desk of Hajib Kafir, staring unseeingly out of the dusty office window at the timeless minarets of Istanbul. He was a man who was at home in a dozen capitals of the world, but Istanbul was one of his favorite cities. Not the tourist Istanbul of Beyoglu Street, or the gaudy Lalezab Bar of the Hilton, but the out-of-the-way places that only the Moslems knew: the yalis, and the small markets behind the souks, and the Telli Baba, the cemetery where only one person was buried, and the people came to pray to him."



5)  Scruples by Judith Krantz


"In Beverly Hills only the infirm and the senile do not drive their own cars. The local police are accustomed to odd combinations of vehicle and driver: the stately, nearsighted retired banker making an illegal left-hand turn in his Dino Ferrari, the teen-ager speeding to a tennis lesson in a fifty-five-thousand-dollar Rolls-Royce Corniche, the matronly civic leader blithely parking her bright red Jaguar at a bus stop."



6)  Evergreen by Belva Plain


"In the beginning there was a warm room with a table, a black iron stove and old red-flowered wallpaper. The child lay on a cot feeling the good heat while the mother moved peacefully from the table to the stove. When the mother sang her small voice quavered over the lulling nonsense-words; the song was meant to be gay but the child felt sadness in it."



7)  Illusions: The Adventures Of A Reluctant Messiah by Richard Bach


"There was a Master come unto the earth, born in the holy land of Indiana, raised in the mystical hills east of Fort Wayne."



8)  The Holcroft Covenant by Robert Ludlum


"The hull of the submarine was lashed to the huge pilings, a behemoth strapped in silhouette, the sweeping lines of its bow arcing into the light of the North Sea dawn."



9)  Second Generation by Howard Fast


"Pete Lomas' mackerel drifter was an old, converted, coal-fired steam tug of a hundred and twenty-two tons, purchased as war surplus in 1919. It cost him so little then that he was able to sell its oversized engine for scrap and replace it with a modern, oil-burning plant. He named it Golden Gate, packed his wife and kids and household goods into it, and sailed from San Francisco Baby down to San Pedro. There he rented a berth for the tug and went into the mackerel business. His wife suffered from asthma, and her doctor determined that the San Francisco area was too damp. Lomas then decided to to make the move to Los Angeles County, and he bought a house in Downey."



10)  Eye Of The Needle by Ken Follett


"It was the coldest winter for forty-five years. Villages in the English countryside were cut off by the snow and the Thames froze over. One day in January the Glasgow-London train arrived at Euston twenty-four hours late. The snow and the blackout combined to make motoring perilous; road accidents doubled, and people told jokes about how it was more risky to drive an Austin Seven along Piccadilly at night than to take a tank across the Siegfried Line."

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Interesting Quotes By Famous People With Big Noses

Being the not-always-proud possessor of a big nose myself, I feel like I can "pick on" some famous people with prominent noses without a high degree of hypocrisy. In truth, I don't find that a larger-than-average nose on a woman makes her any less attractive. Nor do I think that a generously-sized proboscis on a man makes him appear any less distinguished – in fact, he might even look more distinguished because of having a big nose. That being said, here's some things that famous big-nosed people have said...



1)  "I am simple, complex, generous, selfish, unattractive, beautiful, lazy, and driven."  ~  Barbra Streisand, singer/actress




2)  "It would be terribly boring to be earnest."  ~  Adrien Brody, actor




3)  “Don't spend all of your time trying to be like someone else because you can never be them and they can never be you."  ~  Raven Symone, actress




4)  "Misfits aren't misfits among other misfits."  ~  Barry Manilow, singer




5)  "The cold heart will burst if mistrusted first, and a calm heart will break when given a shake."  ~  Feist, singer




6)  "I hate music, especially when it's played."  ~  Jimmy Durante, comedian




7)  "You don't have to look like everybody else. Love who you are."  ~  Lea Michele, singer/actress




8)  "My father was a milkman. So I delivered milk."  ~  Karl Malden, actor




9)  "I live halfway between reality and theater at all times. And I was born this way."  ~  Lady Gaga, singer




10)  "It's a burden trying to keep a secret. It's hard. It probably takes more out of you trying to hold it and keep it than it does for you to really let it out."  ~  Magic Johnson, basketball player




11)  "I don't judge others. I say if you feel good with what you're doing, let your freak flag fly."  ~  Sarah Jessica Parker, actress




12)  "It's funny how it usually works out that I end up dying. It sort of works out, because by the time I die, I'm usually tired of working on that particular movie, so I look forward to it."  ~  Owen Wilson, actor




13)  "I made a pact with myself a long time ago: Never watch anything stupider than you. It's helped me a lot."  ~  Bette Midler, singer/actress




14)  "I like Beethoven, especially the poems."  ~  Ringo Starr, musician/singer




15)  "Don't be so familiar and so much into the details. Keep people dreaming. Close the window, and make them wonder."  ~  Celine Dion, singer




16)  "You know what's nice about Montreal? Not only is it a beautiful city, but you have Cuban cigars."  ~  Jamie Farr, actor




17)  "There's a button that goes 'On' and I'm 'On.' And when I go 'On,' there is almost no me; there is just a character who is doing all this."  ~  Gisele Bundchen, supermodel




18)  "The two basic items necessary to sustain life are sunshine and coconut milk."  ~  Dustin Hoffman, actor




19)  "It seems that the greatest difficulty is to find the end. Don't try to find it, it's there already."  ~  Sofia Coppola, film director




20)  "If cinema is a woman, then certainly there are many shores."  ~  Gerard Depardieu, actor




21)  "I feel like I’m picking up the slack for a whole generation of nonbelievers."  ~  Karen O, singer

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Strange Things Found Inside Fish

Over thousands of years, stories – most true, some fictional, others exaggerated – have been told of strange things found inside fish. Recently, a man who had lost four fingers in a wakeboarding accident was surprised to find that a large trout, caught by fishermen several months later in the vicinity of the accident, had one of the man's severed fingers inside it. Here are a few other outrageous examples of strange things found inside fish....


1)  Haans Galassi's Finger:  Haans is the wakeboarder I just mentioned. This is his fingerless hand.




2)  A 16th Century Portuguese Medallion:  This very old relic was found in the belly of a baby shark.




3)  A Sheep's Head:  This sheep's head (or one very similar to it) was found inside a large grouper.




4)  Two Broken Bottles:  The same large grouper had also consumed a couple of bottles, which were found broken inside it.




5)  A Quart Pot:  Apparently this grouper would eat anything. A quart pot, much like this one, was also found inside the same fish.




6)  A Preserved Milk Tin:  Last but not least, this most un-finicky grouper was found to contain a preserved milk tin much like this one.




7)  A Sack Lunch:  A giant cod was found to contain the makings of a good picnic. It reportedly held within its stomach "a brown paper packet of sandwiches, enough for a pretty large party."




8)  A Pair Of Sweatpants:  A certain gray whale, upon expiring, was found to have ingested a pair of sweatpants, much like these.




9)  A Golf Ball:  The same gray whale had apparently also swallowed a golf ball.




10)  Surgical Gloves:  This same omnivorous whale also had a pair of surgical gloves, much like these, inside it.




11)  Duct Tape:  Knowing its reputation as being useful in repairing nearly everything on earth, the same gray whale had also ingested a roll of duct tape, much like this one.




12)  Small Towels:  And last but not least, to soak up all the detritus of all the other random things it had eaten, the same gray whale was also found to contain a few small towels like these.




13)  Polar Bear Parts:  A shark in Greenland was found to contain parts of a polar bear's body. Presumably, the polar bear had ventured onto too-thin ice, or had simply passed out in the water and become fodder for the sharp-toothed, water-bound predator. Since The Plural Of Hyena is (mostly) a family-friendly blog, I will not post pictures of polar bear parts, but instead will give you a delightfully adorable picture of a living polar bear.




14)  A Man's Head:  You may think the picture below is a complete reversal of what I just said in #13 about this being a family-friendly blog, but fret not – the severed human head pictured below is fake! It's just special effects – so don't freak out! To the point of this post, a man's severed head was found inside a giant cod (but not the same giant cod as the one above that ate the sack lunch).




15)  The Prophet Jonah:  Last but definitely not least, the prophet Jonah (from the Old Testament in the Bible) is reported to have been swallowed whole – alive! – by a "great fish," possibly a whale. Jonah was later vomited up onto dry land by the "great fish" and lived to tell the tale. And – stubborn prophet that he was – Jonah finally decided to actually do just that. You see, Jonah had been running from God for a long time, not doing what God had called him – yes, even commanded him – to do. The moral of this story: Don't be a Jonah. You don't want to have to be swallowed by a whale for God to get your attention. Try and heed His calling before it comes to all that.

Monday, October 22, 2012

Reflections On "A Night Of Drama"

It's Blue Monday, the day after the close of another great drama production. I'm exhausted, as I know we all are. I'm relieved that everything went remarkably well (no dropped lines, no obvious miscues that I could tell). And I'm a little bummed that it's all over – the camaraderie, the friendships formed (and/or renewed, and/or strengthened), and yes, even all the hard work.

If you were able to be a part of the Night of Drama production, whether as a participant or an audience member, you will understand – or at least recognize – all the hard work that went into a presentation such as this. For those of you who didn't get a chance to see it, or did but don't know much of the inner workings of a dramatic production, I'd like to take you behind the scenes a bit.

It all started back in June or July, when I spent as much free time as I could find in searching for scripts that might be suitable for our theme. In conjunction with our pastors, I'd picked the theme of evangelism several months earlier – during the Easter production, if memory serves me. At that time, my wife and I did not yet know that we were expecting a child. (We found out in early May.) By the time I was searching for plays, we had found out, and we knew that our lives were about to be changed forever. Needless to say, I was a little – no, a lot – distracted in my searches for skits. It somehow seemed a lot less important to me then.

To be quite honest, there were times when I considered the idea of not having a Night of Drama production this year. I didn't think I could devote the time and energy I needed to, as well as devoting time and energy to preparing for parenthood. Couple that with the fact that we were trying to get our house ready to sell (it still hasn't), and the fact that – just days before we found out we were pregnant – I had volunteered to act in the VBS play, at times I just couldn't see it happening this year. Not with me heading everything up, at least.

But I persevered, and continued my script searching as time allowed. By late July or early August (memory does not serve me here), I had found four scripts that I really liked and a handful of others that were "just okay." In the past, we have always done five skits, the total length of which filled an entire Sunday night service. I knew that the four skits I liked were not long enough to fill the time, but I was reticent to pick a mediocre fifth script as "filler." So I presented the four good scripts to the pastor who oversees the dramatic productions (my "boss," so to speak), and proposed the idea of having our new Outreach Pastor (and "old" youth pastor) close out the service with an evangelism-themed mini-sermon that would tie the messages of the collective skits all together nicely. Long story short: The scripts were approved, and our Outreach Pastor, Adam Carnes, was on board to speak at the end of the night.

The next step was finding enough people who were willing to be involved to people the casts of the four skits. I needed around 20 people, and the needs were fairly specific. Seven of them had to be teenaged, or thereabouts. Several had to be middle-aged adults, based on the characters they would be playing. Some parts were not as age-specific or gender-specific, but most were.

I posted the signup sheet later than I had hoped, and was only able to have it available for signups for about a week. As a result, the signup numbers were lower than expected. And there were fewer people signed up than there were parts available. Once again, I considered canceling the production. I even spoke with the pastors about that possibility. But in the end, a few more folks signed up, and I crunched the numbers, and realized we would have just enough people to fill out the casting requirements.

For "The Heart Department" skit – a Monty Python-style comedy sketch – there was a part that I was really excited about taking for myself. It would give me the opportunity to use the British accent I've been cultivating (but have never used onstage) for more than 20 years. The skit was silly but meaningful, and its participants would have to be willing – as I was – to somewhat make fools of themselves onstage. At first, I assumed that my castmates would be adults. The other two roles were not age-specific or gender-specific, but they didn't necessarily scream "teenagers!" As it turned out, though, teenagers – albeit 17-year-olds – are exactly what I got. And it couldn't have worked out better. I'd worked with Chris Wiseman in four previous plays, and knew his talent was immense. I also guessed (but didn't know for sure) that he wouldn't mind getting a little silly for the sake of drama – he's always a good sport in whatever part I saddle him with. The "Brain Department" character needed to appear a bit ditzy, but not stupid (the character takes a serious turn toward the end) – and he or she needed to be okay with being laughed at (a lot) by the audience. And, of course, this person also had to be okay with being utterly silly onstage. In the end, Taylor Evans (who has inherited a great knack for comedy from her super-talented mom, Cindy) was the perfect fit. We practiced our skit, for the most part, during the Wednesday night services over the past couple of months. Being a short skit, we could go over it four or five times a night. And with the fast pace and rapid-fire timing that the skit required, we needed the repetition in practice. All in all, it came together quite nicely, and – despite one dreadful run-through the night of our final dress rehearsal – it went very smoothly each time we practiced it. And last night, the skit went off virtually without a hitch.

For "The Road To Bandania" skit – an allegorical, almost Bunyan-esque sketch – which I was also directing, we needed seven talented kids (teenagers) to round out the cast. Fortunately, we had nine talented kids sign up (I stole two of them for "The Heart Department", as aforementioned). Then it was just a matter of pairing each kid up with the part that suited them best. Most of the kids who signed up for this year's Night of Drama were also a part of the youth skit last year. Keeping that in mind, I tried to give the kids who had smaller parts last year more significant roles in this year's youth skit. Thus, Cole Anderson (a seasoned veteran of the Unity stage at age 13 – I think that's how old he is) and Tracy Wiseman earned the "lead" roles in this one. And they didn't disappoint, either. Both of these kids worked extremely hard on their parts, and – despite having the most lines in the skit – learned all their lines very early on. Next up, I needed a "jock" kind of a guy and a "Miss Popular" girl, and Nate Davis (as hard-working backstage as he is onstage) and Rachel Browder (also a Unity drama veteran) were the perfect fits for these roles. Nate seemed to enjoy calling Rachel "Babe" (as he did in the skit) on and off the stage (probably to annoy her), and Rachel seemed to enjoy bossing him around onstage (probably to annoy him) – but all joking aside, these two worked hard and really acted as peer leaders for their fellow castmates. Tyler Justice, a relative newcomer to the Unity drama ministry (aside from youth Christmas productions, that is), was a great fit for "Wounded," and really worked hard to develop his character well. Not being naturally a loud-speaking person (how did that happen, with Kevin Justice as his dad? – just kidding, Kevin!), Tyler had to be reminded frequently to "speak louder" – but he always listened, and was constantly improving. Ever-energetic and enthusiastic, Anna DeCresie was the obvious choice for the "cheerleader" part. Not being able to wear her glasses underneath her bandana, Anna really couldn't see where she was going that well and convinced the audience of her blindness by stumbling into the back of the stage on her way out last night. (I may or may not have chuckled at the sight of this – I'll never tell.) Seriously though, Anna worked hard and continued to show improvement throughout the course of the rehearsals and really nailed it in her performance last night. Last but not least, Christopher Beckett – who excelled in his "lead" role in last year's youth skit – gamely accepted a smaller, but no less important role in this year's skit. And Chris truly made the most of his part. The dramatic pauses that had everyone in the audience dead-silent and listening – those were his additions to the role, not mine. All in all, these kids really made me proud (in the right sense of the word) – for the hard work they put in, the maturity they showed (for the most part), and the joy with which they served their Lord through drama. I'd gladly work with any and all of them again.

For "The Bus Stop" skit – a two-person comedic sketch – we needed two people, a male and a female, who had great chemistry onstage, and could bounce fast-paced lines off each other with relative ease. Who better than an actual married couple? And Jimmy and Lori Bowen are probably the most talented husband-and-wife combo we have in our entire drama team (most of our husbands, wives, or significant others don't also act in plays). Having two small boys to care for, it's often difficult for Jimmy and Lori to both be involved in one of the dramas at the same time. Their kids have to come to the practices with them, which isn't a problem for the rest of us, but it does somewhat complicate things for them. But on the rare occasion when we have a two-person skit like this one, Jimmy and Lori can both be in it together and they can practice at home, on their own turf, on their own time. And that's just what they did. I didn't even see them perform their skit for the first time until the first dress rehearsal just one week ago, and by that point they had nearly perfected it. Last night, they got a few more laughs than even they expected, and that was a testament to all the hard work they put in to work on it, and we appreciate them both – and their patient kiddos – for their commitment to excellence, even when having to self-direct like they did.

The "Take The Plunge" skit – a three-scene dramatic sketch – was by far the most "dramatic", in terms of offstage eventfulness. Michell Smith, a newcomer to our church, did a great job directing her seven-person cast. But she was not the skit's original director. Originally, Teri Pritchard was slated to direct the skit, and had in fact held a practice or two with the cast. But then Teri's mom – who's battling cancer – was admitted to the hospital in the Triangle area, and Teri and her sister were taking turns going back and forth to visit her. Then Teri's mom came back home (to Greenville) and needed almost constant care, which also fell to Teri and her sister. Taking that and her job into account (school had started back during all this), Teri had neither the time nor the energy to helm a skit – and understandably so. I told her from the beginning – if she ever felt like she just couldn't do it, to let me know, and we would work it out. That time eventually came. Michell, who had experience directing dramas at her previous church, had been assistant-directing "The Heart Department" with me for the first few weeks of our rehearsal schedule – since I was in the skit myself, it was difficult to see and identify problems as easily, and Michell was helping out a lot. When Teri was unable to continue as director for "Take The Plunge," I asked Michell if she would be willing to step in and take charge of it. Michell graciously agreed, and the skit continued with a new director.

Consisting of three different scenes that are all thematically linked, I thought it would be a nice touch to have one actor bridge the gap between the scenes by appearing in each. Todd Browder, an incredibly talented actor, hasn't been able to be involved in the dramas for the past few years for one reason or another, but was going to be able to be a part of it this year. Making the most of Todd's ability was paramount, in my opinion, so I cast him in the role of the Father in the first scene, the Husband in the second scene, and the Narrator in the third scene. Todd told me he didn't consider it to be three different roles, but three different aspects of the same character – which makes a lot of sense, actually. Bryce Kime, an über-talented regular member of our drama team, was the perfect choice to play Todd's son in the first scene. The two of them interacted well onstage, and the scene came together quite nicely, thanks to their combined talent and Michell's direction. The small role of the Waiter was eventually played by Tim DeCresie, who happily ad-libbed his two scripted sentences into at least four by the time he performed it last night. But Tim D. was not the original Waiter. Another actor (who I will not name here, to avoid embarrassment) had signed up to be involved in the drama, and was cast in the role of the Waiter. Halfway through the production schedule, this actor had not shown up for a single practice, and repeated calls and emails to the actor by both Michell and myself were unanswered. With time running short, the decision was made to replace the actor with Tim DeCresie. A veteran of the Unity stage (and frequent Jesus portrayer), Tim made the brief role his own, and we're all grateful to him for stepping in at the last minute and doing a great job.

The second scene, which involved a Doctor and a Husband (Todd) and Wife, was actually one of the last to be cast in the grand scheme of things. I had worked with Howard Corey in the VBS play earlier this year, and thoroughly enjoyed the experience. Howard had been the VBS emcee the past couple of years, and had done a great job, but had never ventured into the realm of Easter or fall dramas at Unity. At the end of our VBS run, I asked Howard to consider being involved in the fall drama – being a little more laid-back and less practice-intensive, the fall drama, I told Howard, could be a good starting point for him if he was ever interested in doing more dramas. He said he'd think about it. At the end of our signups, we were still a person or two short. I approached Howard again about the fall drama, and he said he'd like to give it a try. A master ad-libber, Howard was a little worried about having to be "on-script" and having other actors depend on him to say his lines exactly as written. As it turns out, that wasn't an issue at all. Howard worked hard on his part as the Doctor, and really brought a depth of character and a genuine sensitivity to the role. This brief yet poignant scene was easily the most gut-wrenching of the night. Casting Cindy Evans in the role of Todd's wife in this scene was far from a no-brainer. Up until this point, Cindy had always played comedic roles, at which she excels. Cindy is a truly gifted actress, but I had previously thought that comedy was all she could do. Boy, was I wrong! In her few minutes onstage with Todd and Howard, she ripped my heart out (and everyone else's, too, I believe) with her gutsy, emotion-filled performance. Needless to say, I will not be underestimating Cindy Evans again anytime soon!

Kim Evarts is also a superb comedic actress, whose talents have not gone unnoticed heretofore. A veteran of the Unity stage as well, Kim has done both comedic and dramatic parts with aplomb, but really excels whenever an energetic, enthusiastic, or even ditzy part is given to her (to be clear, Kim is quite intelligent – but she plays ditzy well!). As the clueless, self-absorbed Lady in the third scene, Kim was awesome – she was unbelievably aloof, but also disturbingly realistic. I think anyone watching that part was more than a little uncomfortable, because they – as did I – saw a little of themselves in her character. Tim Wiseman was remarkably convincing as the Homeless Man. But he, too, was not the original choice for the part. Erick Henley was originally cast in the role, but had to drop out about midway through the production schedule, due to a conflict with the performance night that he was unaware of when he took the part. Per my request, Erick recruited his own replacement, and came to Michell with a good-news, bad-news scenario – "I have to bow out, but Tim's taking my place." Tim really embraced the role, and made it his own – which didn't surprise me in the least, as Tim always devotes great time and energy to his acting parts.

Offstage, a number of folks played an active role in making A Night of Drama the "success" that it was as well. Michell Smith, who directed "Take The Plunge," also coordinated the finding and gathering of all of our props. Bill Cox worked out and operated the stage lighting for all the skits, while Tim Stox devised the microphone exchanges (19 actors shared 8 microphones, all but one of which had to be exchanged between actors at least once, and sometimes twice) and ran the sound board for the production. Adam Carnes not only gave a mini-sermon following the drama portion of the evening, but he also designed the programs, the Power Point backgrounds, and the Night of Drama posters. Nate Davis and Alexis Whisner were in charge of executing all the scene changes on the stage left side, while Chris Wiseman and I handled all the scene changes on the stage right side. (Were the blackouts between scenes short and barely noticeable? If so, then we did our jobs.) Kevin Justice not only led the singing at the beginning, but also selected the music that was played during the scene changes. Countless folks lifted us up in prayer for several months as we were preparing for last night, and we truly can't thank those folks enough.

Ultimately, our Night of Drama production went extremely well. My hope is that God was glorified through the dramas, that the messages of each skit came through loud and clear, and that maybe the hearts of a few in attendance were pricked because of them. If so, then it was worth every minute of it.

Sunday, October 21, 2012

A Hodgepodge Of Songs With "Egg" In The Title

I know, I know...I'm always coming up with some weird junk that only somebody completely out of their mind would think to write about (or post about, as it were). And today is no exception. The fact of the matter is, I have to write a blog post every day, and some days I just don't have any great ideas. Acceptable ideas, yes, and even occasionally a good idea, to be sure – but this is probably not one of them. If you must know where I got my inspiration for this post, it was from hearing Johnny Cash's "Dirty Old Egg-Suckin' Dog" played in a recent TV commercial featuring an adorably ugly bulldog. I thought to myself, I wonder how many songs I could find that had the word "egg" in their titles. A lot, as it turns out. Several of them were rather sucky, while others had explicit lyrics, and were therefore excluded. These 15 songs made the cut. Listen to them if you wish – or skip through them at random if you prefer. A plethora of musical genres are represented here. In case you wish to listen to songs that more suit your musical tastes, I have included the type of music that each song represents, if you (like me) haven't heard of many of these bands before. Enjoy?


1)  Dean Martin & Helen O'Connell  ~  "How D'Ya Like Your Eggs In The Morning?"  (jazz / pop)



2)  Quasi  ~  "The Golden Egg"  (alternative folk / rock)




3)  The Nightcrawlers  ~  "The Little Black Egg"  (oldies pop / rock)




4)  1776: The Musical  ~  "The Egg"  (show tunes)




5)  Shoe  ~  "Egg"  (modern rock)




6)  Liz Phair  ~  "White Chocolate Space Egg"  (alternative rock)




7)  Wolfmother  ~  "Cosmic Egg"  (classic rock)




8)  Johnny Cash  ~  "Dirty Old Egg-Suckin' Dog"  (country / folk)




9)  Smashing Pumpkins  ~  "Egg"  (alternative acoustic rock)




10)  Sesame Street  ~  "Which Comes First, The Chicken Or The Egg?"  (kids' songs)




11)  Tom Waits  ~  "Eggs And Sausage"  (piano blues)



12)  Backyardigans featuring Adam Pascal  ~  "Not An Egg"  (kids' songs)




13)  Fruit Bats  ~  "A Dodo Egg"  (alternative country)




14)  Louis Armstrong & Velma Middleton  ~  "Big Butter & Egg Man"  (jazz / swing)




15)  Weltenbrand  ~  "Foal In An Egg"  (neoclassical / dark wave)


Saturday, October 20, 2012

More Unfortunate Business Names

I've done posts like this before, though it's been quite a while now. Culled from various places on the Internet, this fresh batch of badly named businesses is sure to elicit a few chuckles. I hope so, at least. Enjoy!


I don't know what they're selling here, but I ain't buying it!


I think we all know how Three Finger Eddie got his nickname, don't we?


Didn't like the fact that you were expecting a baby girl when you
really wanted a boy? No worries! Wait till she's born, then bring her
here. They have just the solution. Hint: It's in the title of the store.


They answer to a higher calling, apparently.


Oh, the irony...


That's what I was thinking about their clothes, too, but I didn't want to say anything.


Flatulent fishermen wouldn't think of shopping anywhere else!


I've heard of this place. Their food is to die for!


Contrary to popular racist opinion, they don't
all taste the same, thank you very much!

Truth in advertising...


Shanghai has a tumor. This shop has the cure. Take advantage
of it, Shanghai! You have too much to live for to give up now!


"The place with cozy nuts dogs"?  No, thank you. I'm not hungry. Or thirsty.


Patty, Pi, and all the other cool kids buy their clothes at Cowpoo.


Their bestselling item is the Arsenic Apple Turnover. Mmm, yummy!


They were going to name the store Treasured Weasel, but they found
out that name was already taken by the candy shop in the food court.