"Judas And Jezebel," "You, Under Stan," And "Of Lice And Lynn": Three Strange Drabbles

It's been awhile since I've written any fiction, so I figured it was about time. Conveniently, the inspiration for some stories coincided with my desire to write stories (the two don't always mesh like you want them to), and – voilà! – here you go. Three strange drabbles from my very strange mind. Enjoy!

"JUDAS AND JEZEBEL"

Theirs was a love affair built entirely on misfortune. His parents never wanted him in the first place, giving him up when he was less than a week old – but not before they cursed him with a name that was quite literally the kiss of death. She was misunderstood from the beginning. Born with a scowl on her face that was probably just gas, she was given a name coveted by none and reviled by many. They found each other in late July, both despondent and disbelieving. Love followed in early August. In September, they died in each other's arms.

"YOU, UNDER STAN"

I was sorting through the piles of rubble that had once been our office building, hoping to see any familiar face that had not been crushed under the falling debris. The first person I recognized was Stan Hopper. I checked his pulse for signs of life but found none. Suddenly, I heard a groan in Stan's general direction. I jumped back and squinted at Stan's lifeless body. Impossible! Then I noticed a small, pathetic-looking figure pinned beneath Stan's corpse. It was you! I couldn't believe my eyes. You'd survived! It was then that I realized I'd always loved you.

"OF LICE AND LYNN"

Balthasar had bought the ring two days earlier. It was the perfect blend of cut, color, clarity, and shape – so the jeweler had told him. He harbored no doubts that Lynn would say "yes." They'd been talking about marriage since their third date. She'd even picked out a dress at a bridal shop – Lynn's brother had told him so. Balthasar's only concern was what Lynn would do when he revealed his secret to her. It was such a little thing really. Well, hundreds of little things. But with time and proper treatment, they could conquer anything – together! – even head lice.